never seeing my mother ever look so sad
reading my grandmother's handwritten prayers
and crying my eyes out because those worn pieces of paper embody her.
it's realizing that
my favorite cat in the whole world may never come home again
that some friends are only temporary
and that if i ever get married, i'm not sure who my maid of honor would be
so i don't want to get married.
but more importantly it's
letting myself feel,
knowing that these things make me who i am,
and willing my heart to keep going.
you don't have to have a maid of honor. :)
ReplyDeletejust think.. one day your grandchildren could be looking at this blog and crying over what a beautiful person you were/are and deciding to be better, stronger, more articulate, caring, and adventurous people because of you just like you are of her.
That's really beautiful.
ReplyDeletehow sweet. you have a way with words!
ReplyDeleteI don't have any idea who my maid of honor would be either... it scares me a lot too. Friends, as of lately, being so temporary is a constant worry that hangs over my head, but every day is new.. so who knows, maybe we'll soon meet the people that can be our best friends & won't turn into crazies/bitches/whatever else girls do... or we can be each other's maid of honor someday ;)
ReplyDeleteas for the tea set, just say it gives it more antique character? although that does suck...
This is WONDROUS, Celeste. I love it, and wish I could articulate these feelings as well as you have!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your sweet comment on my blog. This post of yours spoke so deeply to me today. It is the anniversary of the death of someone very dear to me and just a time when things don't make sense. I recognize this space and know that it will pass. Hold on to the love in your world my friend. That's all we can do sometimes. XoXO
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I don't know who my maid of honor would be either. It's an okay, beautiful thing though, as is your life.
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